X S E X


by Gregory Purvis
August 28, 2009, 11:28 am
Filed under: I'll Show You Mine, Uncategorized

I’LL SHOW YOU MIND: X-Rated Thoughts From A G-Rated Soul

THIS WEEK I’M (FINALLY!) ‘DOIN’ IT’! (Cue Raunchy 70’s Porn Soundtrack Here) 

XSEX was intended to be an adult e-zine that dealt with human sexuality openly and honestly. And in that spirit of honesty, I admit that part (okay, most) of the reason XSEX has been in a state of ‘coitus interruptus’ for the last year (instead of launching with my blog EVIL ROBOTS www.evilrobots.wordpress.com) was…well…fear. Yeah, yeah, I know: I’m a wuss. Whatever. And you’re the Utterly Fearless He-Man Master of the Universe. The truth is, dealing with sex can be HARD. (shut up). I had always intended to create a blog for this topic, and slowly morph it into an open dialog with the look and feel of a monthly magazine. But when EVIL ROBOTS www.evilrobots.wordpress.com launched I was still working for a respectable, conservative daily newspaper in the Deep South. I’m sorry…did I just say “respecta–.” <COUGH> “respec–” <COUGH.COUGH>…excuse me for a minute, I believe I’ve got something stuck in my throat…Ahhh. All better now. A nasty little aftertaste but I can deal with that.

As a member of the slithery, be-tentacled evil Media Mind Control Apparatus, I was expected to maintain a certain ooat-and-tie, church-on-Sunday, “I-voted-for-Dubya” appearance. Okay, maybe I’m exaggerating a LITTLE, but you get the idea, right?  My current haircut (mohawk) and dress code (red and black velvet 1950’s-vintage smoking jacket) was unacceptable.

So now, unemployed status means FREEDOM of a certain sort…oh, and poverty. So XSEX is set to be reborn, Jerry Springer-style.

A few words of warning:

This project is intended for a semi-mentally mature adult audience. IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 GO AWAY. Personally, I do not believe in censorship outside the family structure but to each, his/her own. This project is NOT intended to be graphically pornographic. I won’t post sexually-provocative pictures–though I DO plan to post photographs of artwork and historically-relevant materials that deal with subjects related to posts.  In other words, this ain’t the place for naked pictures of Nancy Grace (the thought is physically abhorrent). What I do want is FEEDBACK and DISCUSSION on all areas of human sexuality.

For our first feature I’ve decided to break someone’s cherry…sort of. Many of you have seen the comedy “The 40-Year Old Virgin” and I’m sure many of us have a friend or relative that does or did fit that description, more-or-less. I certainly do. Since this will be the virgin issue (in a manner of speaking) of XSEX, I thought it fitting to begin with a virgin (in another manner of speaking)…

So my friend (whose name has been changed to protect his innocent–ahem–nature) will be reporting on his first foray into a large, Wal-Mart-sized XXX Adult Mega Store, on scenic Orange Blossom Trail in beautiful Orlando, Florida. We had to kick a few crackhead pan-handlers out of the entrance and show our Alabama drivers licenses to a suspicious pre-op tranny in high heels and a Morticia frite wig (whom we’d interrupted reading a Harry Potter book) just to get inside. I did everything possible (including loudly asking my friend “If he thought he could handle one of these” when we were in the “Strap-on” department) to make his first visit to an “adult novelty store” as humiliating (and hilarious) as possible.

So come back! The Sin (and Fun!) Starts Sunday!

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2 Comments so far
Leave a comment

Wow, amazing blog layout! How long have you been blogging for?
you made blogging look easy. The overall look of your web site is excellent, as well as the content!

Comment by http://www.youthministry.com/user/joseph98noodle

Writing for blogs? about 3 hours or so. Thats mostly why it sucks. Well that and no one seems to get this concerns NOT having sex (anymore) as much as my fellow writers opposite problem (being a recently reformed slut)

Comment by Gregory Purvis




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